The Self-Doubt and Confidence Spectrum

“You need to be more confident!” How many times have you told yourself or have people who told you that?

Having struggled with self-doubt with various degrees and circumstances. I realize confidence is a continuum.

You can feel confident in areas that utilize your strength and when surrounded by people who you feel safe. On the other end of the spectrum, you feel self-doubt when it involves unfamiliar areas and when more powerful people are in the room.

Much like the introvert-extrovert spectrum, an introvert can act like an extrovert in social settings and enjoy solitude when alone. It varies depends on the context and environment.

When I was in graduate school, I felt confident presenting my thesis in front of my lab mates and other graduate students — cause they are a supportive group.

However, when I presented the same materials in front of my defense committee who are famous researchers in their respective fields. I felt completely the opposite. My negative voice said, “they will definitely find flaws in my experiment and data.”

The scale of self-doubt

The questions become how do we change the voice in our head to move closer to the confident side of the spectrum?

My theory is to tip the scale — so that you have more confidence than self-doubt at a given moment.

Positive triggers like remembering previous accomplishments convince yourself that you had succeeded before. Even seemingly insignificant compliments are evidence that you have the potential and are on the right path.

I built up these positive triggers by documenting times when my pitches were well received. I detailed my openings and at which point I start getting my audience’s attention. This avoids my listeners looking disengaged(negative trigger), my self-doubt creeps in

In my previous example of presenting in front of a group of esteemed researchers, I started my talk with results that generated positive discussions in conferences with other equally famous researchers.

Another positive trigger is the belief that others can benefit from hearing my expertise and ideas — rather than fearing that you are wrong or looking stupid. This is particularly helpful for me when I’m not sure if I should voice my ideas in meetings.

Takeaways

Having fear doesn’t mean you are not confident. Everyone has a side of confidence. We just need to find the moments and triggers to amplify that side of you.